What to do now that the world is going to hell?
So, here we go again.
Yes, yes, I had a huge case of writer’s block, but I found motivation in the same place a lot of people before me have:
Our own impending doom.
What do we do now that the world is going to hell?
It’s easy to see.
COVID came and never went.
Just after that, Ukraine started, and then the Middle East started again.
Sudan is intense this time of year, and China will go for Taiwan any moment now.
The horsemen are ready to ride through the sky, and then:
Apocalypse.
Right?
You know what?
I think I can stop writing right now and you guys can figure this one out.
In the end, it doesn’t matter.
Hell is other people when they are not busy being wolves to each other.
All that.
Go out, people!
Abandon yourselves to alcohol and lust.
Betray your diets.
Text your ex.
Start a cult.
Buy crypto.
Commit every socially acceptable crime available to the modern coward.
(But no sexual assault. Even the apocalypse needs standards, and honestly, who can enjoy the end of civilization knowing that guy is around?)
Let’s go out in a blaze of fire.
Let’s accept our worst instincts and honor the monsters in ourselves.
Or…
Let’s just take it easy for a moment.
Yes, everything looks kind of gloomy right now, but hey, we’re about to get disclosure on NHI.
That’s good, right?
Right?
We could be the rats in the labyrinth, and our governments know and let us suffer.
Are we just cattle, and “natural death” is when they harvest us and turn us into cosmic Lunchables?
Are we the bacteria they look at through a microscope?
Are we in their NatGeo documentary?
Are they watching us have sex but…
But it’s not porn.
It’s…
Science.
ARE WE JUST COSMIC PANDAS?
Okay, let’s leave the alien stuff for later, because I have so much of it, and let’s get to the apocalypse part because I…
Well.
You guys get it.
Let’s agree on one thing:
Aliens are not saviors, and they won’t solve our problems.
But let’s get back on track, shall we?
The world is clearly ending.
Soon.
So we can stop working, trying, and doing stuff because hey…
It doesn’t matter!
See what happened there?
The universe just used my phrase against me.
The way I see it, we can take one of two paths:
We can do like the Wari civilization and decide we’re just tired of it all.
Friday is just around the corner, and we’re ready to punch the clock epically and drunkenly.
Build a couple more distilleries.
Drink up.
Have some fun.
And in that magical moment when drunk starts turning into hangover, we throw our glasses into the fire in a ritual closing of civilization and go our separate ways before the bartender comes back and actually charges us for the civilization-ending amount of booze we just consumed.
And hey…
I get it.
Friday, am I right?
Or…
We could put things in perspective.
I have spoken before about my worries regarding our environmental issues. Someone actually answered those worries in terms of money, but hey, it’s Reddit. What are you gonna do?
I’m going to avoid that subject because it’s out of our control right now.
I think — and hope — we’re going to stop and improve.
We do that from time to time.
And hey, if we don’t, we die.
And so do pandas.
The thing about the apocalyptic nature of current events is that these things have been happening since the beginning of time.
Just a bit over 100 years ago, the Spanish flu killed between 25 and 100 million people.
It killed so many people that we still just don’t know.
Then came the war to end all wars.
We can skip a couple of chapters, knowing that worked so well it had a sequel.
Fresh out of the Industrial Revolution, we industrialized death and misery on a scale never seen before.
Then came the greatest war — yet.
Twenty-three million in the first, and around seventy-five million in the second.
Industrial-scale genocide.
And the use in battle of the same physics you pretend to understand when trying to pick up a girl who is both pretty and smart.
She’s onto you.
Give it up.
If we compare numbers, the 20th century took somewhere between 500 and 800 million people before their time, depending on what horrors we decide to include:
Pandemics.
Disease.
War.
Genocide.
Natural disasters.
And just that Monday morning gloom followed by that Friday night recklessness.
We’re almost 30% into the 21st century now.
And let’s not even discuss how amazing, yet irrelevant, it felt to be alive on December 31st, 1999.
All those people dancing on TV.
Discovering the Kiritimati Island in Kiribati and how they cheated to be first into the new millennium.
People speaking of peace and progress.
So much hope.
And there was something about Vladimir Putin.
Heh.
Pootin.
Talk about harbingers of doom.
Comparatively — and I’m not making light of it, even if I make light of everything — the 21st century has taken around 50 million people before their time.
Think about it.
The sinking of the Kursk.
9/11.
The GWOT.
MERS.
COVID.
Joseph Kony.
That documentary about Joseph Kony.
The Tree of Life.
H1N1.
ISIS.
Zika.
Mpox.
Chikungunya.
Fukushima.
Lostprophets.
The rise of YouTubers.
The globalization of sushi and the moment avocado was added to the recipe.
The war in Ukraine.
The war with Iran.
Not one, but two Trump presidencies.
That song by Rebecca Black.
The rise of HDR and the death of color in a world that has turned elegant, yet boring: brutalist gray and steel. Oh, and influencers, whatever they are?
All those horrible things?
And yet, we’re on our way to having a less violent century.
And again, I’m not minimizing tragedy.
I’m looking for perspective.
Something happened that just prevents the worst from happening, and it is this:
We globalized.
This piece will be read by a small group of people, but that small group of people lives all around the world.
A hundred years ago, tragedy in Japan was the equivalent of tragedy on the moon.
Today, you can see what Japan is doing right now.
Distance doesn’t exist.
And this is key in preventing a new world war:
Governments may or may not like each other, but, in general, people like cat videos, boobs, and jokes about Ea-Nasir, that crook.
There are cases of deep enmity, but in general, we want to be able to trade jokes with each other in peace, and we enjoy the ability to ship cheap, poorly made things to each other, consider it commerce, and call it a day.
Poverty has taken a huge hit.
In the 20th century, it looked at all that war, disease, and suffering, said, “That’s sweet. Aim for the stars, kid,” and proceeded to kill a billion people.
In comparison, in the 21st century, a lot of wealth has concentrated at the top, and this is a huge problem because it’s bad for everyone.
Especially for the billionaires.
And we all have their best interests at heart, right?
There is certainly such a thing as too much money.
The number is probably around one billion dollars, and everything much over it is just poison for the soul.
But still, a lot of people have climbed out of poverty.
And we have more people than ever before.
Again, I’m not saying we live in Utopia.
But instead of just disagreeing with my friends, family, and neighbors, I can go online and find people from all around the world to disagree with.
And I can buy 500 stickers that say “for rectal use only,” and when they finally get here, I will probably get arrested for very creative vandalism.
And yes, that’s part of the problem.
Hell, charge me twice for the stickers and pay more to your workers.
I’m willing to pay more for my computers, phones, and clothes if that money makes the people making me happy also happy.
But we’re getting there.
Are there horrible working conditions in sweatshops in Asia?
Yes.
Are those conditions improving?
Not fast enough, but yes.
But even those horrible jobs are jobs, and millions of people have used them to, again, climb out of poverty.
To the tune of 1.4 billion this century.
It’s kind of like this:
The human spirit tends to be unbreakable.
After a long day, a man loves to take his wages home, and a woman hers, and use whatever they got to further love and care for themselves and their children, if they have them.
And with a lot of bad days at work, things get built.
Yes, even on Mondays.
Warfare is happening, and sadly, I think it will keep happening.
Even so, smart weapons and the wide availability of cameras on the battlefield have turned combat into even more of a spectator sport.
But they have also made reflection about what man can do to man widespread.
The true cost of war — the loss of life and limb, the loss of happiness and wellness for creatures that are just as complex and precious as yourself — has become something you can track hourly.
And this, if nothing else, will force politicians to consider war more taboo each year.
Again, it’s not perfect.
But let me return my phrase to the universe:
It doesn’t matter that it’s not perfect, as long as it’s improving.
And with all the imperfection and roundabouts that can be expected from a species of drunk, violent apes who think too highly of themselves…
So, to answer the question we started with:
What do we do now that the world is going to hell?
The answer is not very nihilistic.
I accept it:
Your best.
Plant a tree.
Fall in love.
Don’t have children.
Try not to consume.
Walk instead of driving.
Be kind to each other.
And fucking vote.
Vote consciously.
That way, if the jaws of hell open up to eat us — and the pandas — we’ll know that we deserve it.
Again, ending on a high note.
No.
This won’t do.
Last night, I had trouble sleeping and remembered a girl who used to want to get involved in everything I did.
Precious little thing.
Looked like an Elf princess from a fantasy novel.
And I liked her like crazy.
“Saturday I’m cleaning up my rack’s wiring.”
“Great. I’ll help you.”
“I want to watch the extended editions of The Lord of the Rings.”
“I’m there.”
“This weekend I plan to try heroin. See if I like it.”
“I’ll make sure you don’t stop breathing.”
It took me 16 years, 3 months, and around 17 days, but last night I finally had the sinking feeling and the need to scream.
I’m sorry, dear.
I’m just not very smart.
I hope you’re happy in your marriage.
Be better, Sisyphus.
Be better.
